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It’s Really Hard to Like You
Columns & Opinion, Main
July 5, 2024
It’s Really Hard to Like You

Ever been looked squarely in the eyes and bluntly told you are a bitter, angry person? Probably not. After all, who in their right mind wants to be within twelve feet of a bear and throw heavy stones at that huge, furious mass of muscle and bone? Nobody wants to face that.

Facing that bear would be the equivalent of standing in the same room with you while telling you this truth; “You are hard to be around. You always find a way to be angry … always. It never seems to matter what the subject happens to be when we are talking, you are always upset. Another thing. When anyone does something for you, it’s never quite enough. You are never satisfied. You are a bitter, resentful person, and everyone knows they take their emotional life in their own hands when they choose to be around you for very long at all. I love you, but I am so tired of your constant attitude that this world owes you something. In your painful and twisted thinking, you somehow hold every one of us accountable for your loss. And you will continue doing it until you get what you want, or until the day you die.”

Of course you probably have never been told that. For two reasons. You are still loved by family and friends, in spite of your difficult personality. And no one who loves you wants to hurt you with such cruel, blatant words. And secondly, humans are basically a chicken-hearted race when it comes to poking an angry bear.

But, Bitter Person, you need to hear some loving truths. And that truth is this; You do have to live this life. Unless you get so fed up and bitter that you decide to end it all. And because you have to live this life, you deserve to live it in peace. To have joy and forgiveness that will make all the difference in the years you have left. For your own sake, you need to face your loss, forgive God and anyone involved, and decide to embrace what you have left and enjoy it.

Yes, you will probably always mourn what you don’t have anymore. That is understandable. But here’s the problem. Each and every day while you are walking forward, you have your head turned around backward as you gaze longingly at the past. Blind to your future. And that is causing you to stumble over every crevice and rock in your way, bringing even more pain. And the curves on that road you are on? There’s no way you can see ahead and prepare for maneuvering them successfully. Plus, you never get to see the beauty that is still ahead on your path. All of this is causing you to be bitter and angry. Hurting. Unlikeable. And lonely.

Like the title of a song that was recorded years ago by a friend of mine, It’s Time To Learn To Love Again.

Please. — Podcasts are available at Coffeetimecolumn. com. Send any responses to andybowman839@ gmail.com.

A: Main
Candidate filing period concludes
December 5, 2025
The three-day candidate filing period for local school boards and municipal offices in Okmulgee County officially closed Wednesday, setting the stage for a series of nonpartisan elections that will ta...
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A: Main
Hallmark Christmas arrives
December 5, 2025
Henryetta is set to shine brighter than ever this Saturday, Dec. 6, as the community gathers for one of the most festive nights of the season - Henryetta Hallmark Christmas. From 4-9 p.m. at Gazebo Pa...
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HEF surprises teachers with nearly $20,000 in grants
A: Main, Main...
HEF surprises teachers with nearly $20,000 in grants
December 5, 2025
Henryetta Public Schools is celebrating an early Christmas this week, thanks to the extraordinary generosity and behind- the-scenes dedication of the Henryetta Education Foundation (HEF). In an announ...
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A: Main
Nominations open for Henryettan of the Year
December 5, 2025
The Henryetta Free-Lance is calling for nominations for the coveted Henryettan of the Year award, honoring those who have dedicated their time, talent and efforts to make Henryetta a stronger, more vi...
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Obituaries
Yvette Marie Mitchell
December 5, 2025
November 29, 2025Yvette Marie Mitchell, 66, died on November 29, 2025, in Tulsa. Memorial services will be held Saturday, December 13, 2025, at 11 a.m. at the Okmulgee Chapel of Keith D. Bigelow Funer...
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Obituaries
Karen R. Martin
December 5, 2025
July 2, 1955 - December 3, 2025Karen Martin, a resident of Henryetta, passed away on December 3, 2025, at the age of 70. Services are pending with Rogers Funeral Home.
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