I love living right down the block from my sister. We often get visits from my nieces, nephew, and Aunt Mick, and I wouldn’t have it any other way! One day a few months back my niece came down to our house to ask me a question. She said, “Aunt Jenn, my mom said that if you said yes I could get Snapchat on my phone! Can I get Snapchat?” In what I would have liked to have been a very touching moment with my niece where I explained my answer with one hand on a shoulder, crashed and burned when I blurted out without thinking, “H*** no!” It surprised everyone, including myself, when the words rushed out of my mouth.

I knew exactly why my sister had sent my niece down to our house. She knew that I would say “no.” You see, my sister and my husband are both teachers, and I am a former child abuse and neglect investigator. We know exactly what dangers hide in apps that can reside on a child’s smartphone (not just Snapchat). This week I would like to dive into the hot topic of social media safety.

For the sake of brevity, I won’t go into details on every app that is available, as there are simply too many. The first point I would like to discuss is the idea of protection vs. punishment. As parents, we like to give freedom to our children, especially when they have earned trust, but ultimately we have to remember that kids are still kids and do not have fully functioning adult decision making skills. That’s where we need to step in for our children. If your kids have a tablet, video game console, smart-phone, smart TV, or any other electronic device that has the capability of connecting to the internet, I am urging you to have safeguards in place. As we talk over the next two weeks about internet safeguards, I want you to keep this motto in mind: You are not punishing, you are protecting.

Some of you may be asking, what’s the big deal about Snapchat? I think that if you knew the number of nude pictures that are being sent by minors you would be shocked. It happens everyday folks. Kids think that the picture will be deleted or that it once it’s viewed that is the end. It’s not. We need to start educating our kids about what steps need to be taken if they receive nude photos, or if they are sending them. What may seem like harmless “fun” can end up being a ticket to jail for child pornography depending on the ages of the children involved. I pick on Snap because it is a commonly downloaded app, but there are plenty of other ways that pictures are sent and received. It’s important to know what apps are on your child’s electronic device. If you don’t recognize an app icon, my best advice to you is “Google it.” It also doesn’t hurt to open up apps to see what comes up. Some apps have icons that look like calculators to disguise as other normal phone functions.

Jennifer Avery is the Director of the non profit agency, “The Rowan Fund”, which seeks to support adoptive and foster families in Okmulgee County. She resides in Morris, OK with her husband and two children. Questions or comments? Send them to RowanFamilyTree@gmail.com.